Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Tea is Better for You

The teapot whistled, waking Brian from his sleep. Ugh, tea in the morning. He needed a jolt to wake up, and if he drank tea and coffee he would be running to the bathroom all day. Brian’s wife said tea was better for him, so he would take the cup, kiss her goodbye and head to the drive thru for coffee.

On his way to the office, Brian pondered the heaviness in the air. There wasn’t a storm on the horizon – just a gray day, like the ones before it and the ones to come. Maybe it wasn’t the day. Perhaps the gray cloud hovered just inside Brian’s mind like the memories he couldn’t release.

“Oh, Brian, it’s your turn to read,” the teacher announced with a smirk.

Brian would stare at the page, “D-d-d-d o-o-o-gz arrrrraaaahh m-m-m-aaaanz b-b-b-esst friend!” Brian took a deep breath as the class roared with laughter. He thought he would pee his pants, so he jumped from his seat and rushed toward the door. Craig stuck out his foot, and Brian fell to the floor. The sudden collision released his bladder.

“Eeww! Gross!” was all he could hear as he lie on the white tiled floor unable to move.

Brian reached for his briefcase in the backseat and headed into the building where he worked the past eight years. He had moved up in the organization securing a position in management. He liked his job; his colleagues were great. But anytime he heard people talking and laughing outside his office, he knew for sure, they were making fun of him.

The same week as the “accident” in class, the freckle faced girl with the frizzy reddish brown mushroom hair, caught up with Brian on the walk home.

“They’re all jerks. There’s nothing wrong with stuttering,” she spat through braces and a lisp. Kelly was a close 2nd to Brian on the list of kids to bully. He couldn’t fathom how the two of them together would help matters. So he ignored her, quickened his pace, and abruptly turned to cross the street.

“Hey, wait! Do you want to go to the dance?” Kelly yelled. Brian stopped in the middle of Livingston Avenue. He looked at Kelly and couldn’t pick out one thing about her he liked. He even enjoyed her turns at being tortured because it meant he got a small, but welcomed break.

“Sure,” he shrugged. Then Brian jumped out of the street just in time to miss on-coming traffic.

Brian was tripped twice on the dance floor, but the 2nd time Kelly warned him and he played it off like it was a dance move; Kelly was shoved into the punch, the large bowl wobbled spilling onto her pink dress but Brian grabbed her arm before she crash landed into the table; Craig got on the mic and dedicated a song stuttering every syllable; and kids threw wadded up paper at Kelley that read “Most Likely to be Ugly.” All in all, it was a successful night for the two of them. Both had experienced much worse on their own, and this was the first time either had danced in public.


Kelly now wore a full head of convincing Brazilian weave, the braces were gone, the freckles were covered flawlessly by cosmetics, and she only lisped at Brian’s request. Brian stopped stuttering, and they got married after college. Kelly never mentioned the day Brian peed his pants in class; but every morning, she offered him tea.